Thursday, May 20, 2010

Recruiting For a Soul Mate

I work in Recruitment. My previous job was a Matchmaker. Similar roles really. I find jobs for people - I find love for people. Two massively important missions in life. Two massive responsibilities. Two long processes……

The process of applying for and landing your dream job is not a small journey. It requires research, diligence, lots of shoe polish and the art of negotiation – and that’s just for your Recruitment Consultant!

Although it’s got me thinking. Recruiting a love interest is a whole lot harder than getting a job. You would think. But do we do enough due diligence?

What job requires family and friend approval before the probation period is up? Have you ever had to strip naked for 3rd interview? Unless you are working in the Porn industry then I think probably not……

It’s funny. Because in both roles I have been handed lists of requirements or Job Descriptions. Recruitment is an easier match. After hours investigation is not a requirement. I never have clients rejecting a candidate due to their bad taste in bedroom linen (just as a side girls – red satin sheets are not a good advertisement for your chastity) or a candidate rejecting a client due to the size of “shoes”.

If you think about it - there are so many boxes to tick when looking for a soul mate, its amazing that anyone ever gets together – let alone stays with someone for a lifetime.

But the thing is – when it works, it works. In both cases. Finding the right job is so incredibly important. We spend so much of our life at work. And then thinking about it when we are not even there. It has to be “the right fit” on so many levels, economically, socially, intellectually. It has to correspond to your overall ambition and direction.

Wow! Transfer all that to a partner and it sounds like a relationship yeah? Add on all the extras and TA DA! There’s your wish list for a relationship.

I am not advocating a cold, clinical process in looking for a relationship – far from it. The romantic in me would not stomach it. Cover all bases sure – but don’t underestimate the power of intuition. Be gentle with your applicants – but don’t stray too far from your Job Spec. If someone seems dodgy then they probably are. Their manipulated CV
will probably be revealed as forgery sooner or later. “She is just a friend babe. You are just being neurotic” or “I have only ever had sex once in my life before you” will be discovered sooner or later. Reference check people. Reference check.


  1. Janie I'd never thought about the 'partner-choosing' process as being congruent to job recruitment, but it's so true!

    I guess there are subtle differences... For example when there are workplace conflicts, HR is brought in to settle the dispute immediately. Sadly though in a relationship, many are quick to 'cast to the winds' their association without third party appraisal and mediation.

    In a perfect world, well in my perfect world, there would be a mediator involved in every relationship argument, who decides immediately who is right and who is wrong, who is being neurotic, and if, yes, she really does look fat in that. A robot would suffice. And both parties would have a pre-nup that determined the unquestioned infallibility of the robot.

    Or maybe all of this could be avoided in the first instance, with reference checks as you suggest. If only it were appropriate to contact the EX for a reference check!

  2. Jane, I agree that job recruitment and dating has a lot in common. It's got me thinking that the the analogy could be projected into the relationship itself.

    Finding the right career or landing the dream job takes patience and persistence. When you get to this point of job satisfaction, there's still work to be done to make sure things don't go sour or for the shine to rub off. Even though it can seem a chore from time to time, professional development, staff meetings, social gatherings, dare I say...staff bonding sessions... can all play their part in ensuring ongoing satisfaction.

    So I think it is important to be proactive like this in our relationships to keep improving things instead of letting things slide. Being complacent about our relationships, assuming things will work themselves out, that everything will always be as satisfactory as they were in the beginning - we wouldn't do this in the workplace so why be indifferent in the most important part of our lives, our relationships with others? Bonding sessions may not be so bad after all.